Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Divorce is Still Broken

In a recent Huffington Post article about “blended families” I came across this opening quote, “Just because your family has been through a divorce does not mean it is broken. In fact, it's quite the opposite.” I cannot disagree with this statement strongly enough. Even IF you don’t agree with the Orthodox Christian understanding of marriage, how divorce can EVER be considered anything other than broken is beyond logical. But then again, I don’t look to the Huffington Post for logic, especially when it comes to Christian ideals. But hey....did you notice I had to use the term “Orthodox Christian” understanding of marriage? We can’t even say “Christian” anymore since a growing number of Christians are fleeing from the Holy and Sacred Traditions of the Faith.

But, more about why I am so upset about this article. First, by way of disclaimer, my parents never divorced, so I don’t have FRIST HAND knowledge of what it means to grow up in a broken family. BUT that doesn’t mean I haven’t seen the pain and struggle, especially of children, in the wake of divorce. One friend, speaking with someone who’s father had died said, “At least you have a grave to visit.” Her parents were divorced and what she had known as a father in her family was no longer a realty. Who would DARE tell her that her family was not broken?
In our fallen world, we are tempted to continually rationalize away the pain, struggle, and brokenness of the world. The result is a false sense of security that we are “wholesome” to borrow the hash tag from the Huffington Post article. If we are not broken, then we have no need for healing. If we do not need to be healed, then....who needs God anymore? But there’s one problem...


And when we feel the pain, which is quite real, we can’t reconcile the pain we feel with the lie that we are not broken. In the book “Generation Me” author Jean Twenge, points out that once we encounter the TRUTH that we are broken, despite the promises of society, we can’t cope.  One reason she offers for the large number of medicated and depressed young adults in America, is this often life-threatening realization that we have been lied to our entire life.

So, please....if you really love your friends and families who have struggled, are struggling, or will struggle, with divorce (or any other brokenness of our fallen human state)....please have enough love and compassion for them by telling them the truth. “Yes Johnny, the family is broken, but God still loves you, and the love of God can soothe any pain in your heart.” have to admit something is broken before He can help.

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